I know I’ve already said it. I’ll say it again. This last year has been the fastest of my life.
I became a mummy for the second time and now that beautiful baby, is turning one.
One.
How did that happen? When did 12 months pass by so bloomin’ quickly?
How did she turn from a little seed into an affectionate blue eyed beauty, before my eyes? I must have missed something. Mind you, I certainly haven’t missed it by being asleep!!
I remember before she was born, saying to Luke that I was genuinely worried that I wouldn’t love her as much as Harley. It really bothered me. But the minute the little babe was placed in my arms, my heart doubled.
Each baby creates their own love. And she most certainly is a dream come true.
When I was younger my dream was to have two children, a boy first then a girl with 3 years between them. My dream is now a reality. How bloody lucky, am I?! I’ve also got 2 step sons to fill our home with even more love and adventure… and noise!
Dear Lola,
I Remember… the day you were born so clearly. I was able to enjoy you being born (unlike your cheeky brother!) I was so happy that they handed you to me to cuddle, as soon as you were born. That was everything. Right there. You had a tiny forcep mark on the side of your face and you had lots of dark hair. Your eyes were bright and eager to meet the world. You were hungry and fed really well. I should have known, that a year later you would want to eat everything you could get your hands on!
I Love…the way you give us kisses. You’re so affectionate. You climb up onto us, put both of your little arms around our neck and dive, opened mouthed to plant a big wet, smacker of a kiss. I love the way you dance when you hear music.
I worry… still, that I’m not doing things right. It’s funny how even though I’ve done it once already, I still doubt myself; I still have insecurities and I am still amazed everyday, that I’ve kept this little person alive and you are who you are, partly because of me. Maybe instead of worrying, I should just think, Yeah, I rock, look at what I made!
I’m Sorry… that I have to work on your first birthday. So very sorry. It breaks my heart but I think it means more to me than it does to you. You’re not even going to know that it’s your birthday. But I will rush home and we will have a little pink teaparty, just for you.
I Wonder…what your second year will bring you. I wonder what new characteristics you will develop and which new milestones we will reach. I cant wait to discover more about you.
I Promise…that no matter who enters your life, I will love you more than any of them.
So little Lola, when you turn one next week, I want you to know how very proud I am of who you are growing up to be. Know also that my heart is aching as you are now one big step away from being that tiny baby who was dependent on me for everything.
Love you, Popsie. xx
my life. my love. 